Eurovision Lyrics Winners

Readers respond!

Below are the winning entries of our City Paper Best Banal Eurovision Lyrics Contest. We thank all these talented songwriters for their truly terrible lyrics—which are every bit as good as anything being sung on today’s Eurovision stage. Bravo to these brave new songwriters. (As an added bonus, a friendly band will set some of these lyrics to music. We’ll post those recordings on our website. Watch this space!)

Untitled
by Merike Heliander

Let´s go to HARMONY !
All these`s families!
All these´s people!
All these´s children!

Let´s join this melody!
Let´s join this PEACE of SOUL!
You have allways hope-
love of GOD!

Let´s go to praying!
Lets´s start to paying-
PEACE of all the WORLD!
PEACE of every SOUL....!!!

My Euro-girl
by Harri Kumpulainen

My euro-girl, you are so sweet
i love you so, all time  i miss
those tiny [censored] and friendly [censored]
my dearest girl i need yours kiss.

    "You are wet dream

      you will no money

      you drink just [censored]

      you are thru honey "

My smiling girl, you are my life
those tiny [censored] and wanton [censored]
i love you more than my wife.
She is so cold, i need yours heat.

[Censorship courtesy of the Committee for a More Decent Eurovision.]

Get on Baby
by Kimmo Hyykoski

Get on baby – get on
Gimme, gimme Your attraction
Looki, looki in my ice
Don’t You thinka twice

I gotta get You baby
Please don’t say maybe
I just can’t wait You
Don’t make me hate You

I’ll be Your macho bodygard
I wonna give You my big fart
Never leave me alone
I’m your rolling stone

Shall lal laa - get on
Shall la loo - get on

Is it Yes?
by Esa Rimpiläinen

You´re so pure but I`m not sure
If I do – love, love you.
Uuuu – ooo!
It´s so difficult!

Please tell me will you be
In my heart – its so dark
Uuuu – ooo!
It´s so difficult!

I feel so looooonely
I feel so sad!
You are so faaaaar away
What can I say?

I feel so looooonely
I feel so sad!
You are so faaaaar away
What will you say?

Is it yes…

Eurovaisu
by Martti Immonen

Hubba bubba häbä duu
how we all love you
Europe - this is all 4 you
danke, merci, tack - yuhuu

city, hotel, bus or car
maybe not that far
look here there everywhere
this song is your nightmare

where u go
we miss u so
hubba bubba häbä duu
how we all love you

Untitled
by Vidka

I woke up in the morning,
another day so boring.
I felt so sorry for me,
cause I knew how it's going to be.

There's so much love,in the world burning,
you just have to learn, how to earn it.

Again I saw you crying,
it made me feel like dying.
I lift you up, right to the top,
and try to send your pain away!

There's so much love, in the world burning,
you just have to learn, how to earn it.

Untitled
by M.Nykänen

Juudea is in Europa
Russia is too
Viva Afrika and
brotherhood

Mosse is a car
Moshe barbar
bar is always open
in the USA

Untitled 1
by Anna (Last name withheld by request)

the road is dark
but sun is there
my eyes are closed
but wind gives help

you are my guide
you are my ray
you are my love
and i am your grace

i am going through mountains
i am going through days
every step - full of pain
but hope is there, because

you are my guide
you are my ray
you are my love
and i am your grace

Untitled 2
by Anna

i miss you every day
from morning till evening
think only about my dear
where are you now?

my life is for you
your life is for me
my smile is for you
your smile is for me

we will be together
forever and ever
and nobody never
will be as loved as youuuuuuuuuuuuuu ................

my life is for you
your life is for me
my smile is for you
your smile is for me

Untitled
by Erkki Ahonen

Come here, come here and listen
My heart is going in missing.
I have seen so many people kissing
and that's is okay.

Hear me and hear my feelings
I want that you are not seeking.
Many people are also giving
love you and that's enough.

Love is kind
Do you understand?
Love is all around
Do you notice that?
Love is happy

Do you know it?
Love is also heavy
Do you believe me?

Fri Dolce Vita...
by Sandell Leevi

Why Playboy pump pump a little bit Lapponia?
Why Playboy pump pump a little bit Lapponia?

Why Hard Rock Halleluja takes 2 to tango?
Why Hard Rock Halleluja takes 2 to tango?

Why tipi-tii addicted to you?
Why tipi-tii addicted to you?

Why yamma yamma reaggae ok?
Why yamma yamma reaggae ok?

Leave me alone bye, bye, bye...
Leave me alone bye, bye, bye...
Leave me alone bye, bye, bye..
Leave me alone bye, bye, bye...